Aug 21 2009
Jane and her new BFF, Dorothy
We’ve had some problems lately with Jane wandering away. She’s an independent cuss for being so small. But yesterday, I figured out what was going on.
As I was leaving work at 6:15 yesterday, trying to make the death-defying left turn out of our parking lot on to 800 N, I heard the sound that says I have a voice mail. And, in an utterly unpredictable move, I actually listened to the message.
“Hellooo, this is Dorothy and I believe I have your little dog. I think her name is Jane. She comes to visit me all the time, and I have fed her and given her water, but you may want to come get her. She comes over to play with Sam, the lab across the street. ”
Actually, the message was much longer than that, and Dorothy sounded about 117 years old.
So I called her.
“Dorothy, this is Lianne Bremer. You have my dog Jane.”
“Oh yes, dear, she’s right here and I’m rubbing her tummy. I just gave her some ham and doggy cookies, and she’s very happy, but I don’t know where she lives. She comes over to play with Sam.”
“Sam the Labrador?”
“Yes, he lives across the street, but his owners are vegetarians, so he comes to my house and I feed him dog food. I’ve had 3 Labradors, and I just put down my Sam about 2 years ago. That’s why the neighbors named their lab Sam, because of my Sam. Jane and Sam are great friends, and they often both come to my house. But I didn’t know where she belonged, and the last time she was here I just called the police because the phone number on her tag was wrong.”
“OK, Dorothy, I’m on my way home. I’ll be there in about 10 minutes.”
“She’s an awfully sweet dog, but her hair was really wild the first time she came to visit. I thought she was homeless, but then I realized it is just her hair. But she and Sam play together.”
“Well, Jane’s best friend was a Labrador. We lost him last Spring.”
“Oh I see. Well, she comes over all the time and I didn’t know where she belonged.”
“Well, I’m on my way.”
She yammered on for another 3 or 4 minutes about her dogs, and it made my drive home very pleasant.
When I arrived at her house, she was in the backyard with Jane. I was really close on my estimation of her age. One of the first things she told me was that she was turning 90 in two weeks.
“They made me renew my driver’s license! I had to go to the doctor and answer these stupid questions. It was so disrespectful!”
“I really don’t want another dog, even though Jane is very sweet. I’ve had three Labradors and it is just too hard to lose them. They all lived to be 14 years old, but I don’t want to go through that again.”
“You know, last week when Jane came over, she was in heat. Sam was really close to her, but he didn’t try to hump her.”
Hump. Dorothy the 90 year old spit-fire said hump. I was dying.
After another 15 minutes of her telling me about her life (and she is darling), I finally got Jane in the car and drove around the corner to my house.
I had a long talk with Jane and told her that even though Dorothy gave her cookies and ham, she didn’t want a dog. And maybe we could invite Sam over to play sometime.
They think it was/is Swine Flu, and frankly I think it is the Gerbil Flu which is MUCH WORSE than the Swine Flu. I believe Robbie gave it to me when he came home onJuly 22nd. I started with symptoms on Monday, July 27 AND I AM STILL SICK some TWELVE days later.